Lets talk motivation

As  a coach it is not my job to  motivate you, but I can help you find the motivation that resides inside you.

“You’ll see it when you believe it” - Wayne Dwyer

Our beliefs are shaping our thoughts, which activate feelings which informs our actions that ultimately results in the CURRENT REALITY. So it stands to reason that we cannot just make change at the behaviour/ action/doing level because what is underpinning that is the BELIEF.

If you hear me bang on enough, you will know that I always talk about the ROOT CAUSE, in this case the root cause is the belief. Action level is still symptom management and a very surface level approach with short term results.

 Quite often it is not about needing more information, because you already know what you should be doing, but not doing it. The information just sparks off motivation to get you started, but does not seal the deal for in terms of a long term change.

You have to ask yourself, where is the motivation for change coming from? Is it fear based or development based?

So what is it that motivates us?

There are 2 types of fear based motivation:

1. Deficiency based, aka lack.

   • This type of motivation shows up in ‘SHOULDs’. I should exercise today, I should eat this broccoli. The person is not doing the ‘right action’ because they truly want to do it, but because an external source of pressure says do it.

2. Threat based

   • This type of motivation can propel us to action because of known, unknown threats, illness avoidance or environmental threats. It is my observation that this is more post people operate from.

@dnevozhai

Quite often with this type of fear based motivation, it may get you started but does not stack up in terms of long term sustainable change. The challenge will always be to continue to behave in the ‘healthier new way’.

Someone will usually begin wellness coaching with someone because they tried the ‘solo’ route many times and have been unsuccessful.

What if we took a different perspective and looked at development based motivation?

Development based motivation is really aimed at personal growth and is based on Maslow’s hierarchy of needs with the view that all of us have a need to actualise our potential.

“One can choose to go toward safety or forward towards growth. Growth must be chosen again and again, fear must be overcome again and again” - Abraham Maslow

Jay Kimiecik, author of the book “The Intrinsic Exerciser” says that some of best motivation comes from within. It is an outer expression of an inner motivation, the internal drive to be more of who we truly are.

 Another view point for motivation is where is it coming from, Love or Fear?

Truly ask, where is the motivation coming from? One based on love is more than likely going to lead to the long term sustainable change you were after and provide a sense of accomplishment, self confidence and self esteem. Motivation based on fear will keep you stuck on the never ending cycle of starting and never finishing, otherwise known as lack and limitation.

 Overall summary for motivation:

• It is either fear based on development based

• There are 2 types of fear based motivation:

  • Deficiency

  • Threat

• Fear based motivation gets you started, but is not sustainable for long term change

• Development based motivation is based on personal growth, love and self-actualisation

In essence the question to ask yourself is, “Where is my motivation coming from?” and “Can I achieve this alone?”

If you are sick and tired of the solo journey and ready to get results fast, then email me on info@chantalkhoury.com.au for a FREE chat.

If you want to carry on the conversation and start your health transformation journey, then join me in the FB Group, Empowered Mums. Just click the link below:

Chantal is a Certified & Accredited Nutrition & Wellness Coach on a mission to empower mothers and women to show up as the best version of themselves physically and mentally so that they can empower the next generation with health and resiliency. She has a special interest in healing nutrition and mindset transformation.

Educate and Inspire vs Diagnose and Treat - the role of coaching

In the conventional medical health model, it is typically all about prescribe and treat, otherwise known as let’s look at what is wrong with you and treat that in isolation. This does not leave the patient in a very empowered position.

Let’s be clear, modern medicine is nothing short of being genius when it comes to acute conditions and emergency situations, but does very little from a preventative approach.

So whilst medicine appears to be very physiological, the success rate is often determined by the psychological aspects. In the field of behavioural medicine , there is an understanding that nothing is physiological, but psycho-physiological instead. In simple terms this means that there is no separation between a persons mind and body. They work together and impact each other, therefore you cannot look at any symptom in isolation.

This is where wellness coaching becomes golden, it is focused to look at the person as a whole from a holistic approach to induce positive behaviour change to achieve a desired health outcome.

We are in an age where it is not enough to just know information, you need to act on it.

How do we make this action happen is the jackpot question?

According to Integrative and Functional Medicine, much if not most of health comes down to lifestyle behavioural change from a holistic point of view.

This is realms of health and wellness coaching, it is there to not only educate in a specialised area, but to also inspire and support the growth and development of the client. Coaching is seen to be standing by the client, with them and next to them, so eloquently explained by Michael Arloski as mountain guides. The mountain guides do not climb the mountain for people, but instead help them by:

@charlotemsk

• Planning the climb

• Assessing the physical and mental readiness to climb

• Examining whether the climber is equipped with the right tools to climb

• Together plan the best route

• Does not force the climber to climb the mountain, the motivation to climb must come from the climber

• At times when the climber is discouraged, the guides gently supports the climber to reach a little deeper and keep going

A health and wellness coach is like a good mountain guide that is providing you support and accountability.

Whilst it may seem like the ‘action’ that is needed is simple, yet you struggle to do what you know you should be and then you beat yourself up about it! You will be pleased to know that none of it is your fault, but has everything to do with how your mind is currently wired in terms your beliefs, thoughts and feelings which are informing your actions. Trying to make any sort of long term sustaining change is next to impossible without examining this aspect.

Join me inside the Empowered Mums Group where I dive into this much more along side the right actions to take at the root cause level.

Chantal is a Certified & Accredited Nutrition and Wellness Coach on a mission to help stressed and overwhelmed mums transform their physical and mental health so that they feel energised, confident and calm to build a thriving resilient healthy happy family.

Let's talk about for RESPONSIBILITY for SELF in terms of Health & Wellness

Upfront I’m going to say that I will not be mincing my words in this article, because it is a huge factor to your success or failure in health and wellness and ultimately in life.

When I refer to it, what do you I mean? Responsibility for Self!

You are responsible for you. We cannot blame anyone else, although tempting and compelling sometimes. Yes, we all have circumstances thrust upon that is outside of our control, but how we move forward or CHOOSE to view it, is ultimately our responsibility

Responsibility is also a tenet in coaching that is key. When the client accepts responsibility for their own actions and results, only then can they move forward.

@garidy

Let’s explore this further using Don Ardell’s Model of Health which is built on the following:

• Self Responsibility

• Nutritional Awareness

• Stress Management

• Physical Fitness

• Environmental Sensitivity

He goes on to explain that taking responsibility for our choices, feelings, what we say to our self is critical in every aspect of our life.

Self responsibility is needed in every aspect above.

We cannot complain of ill health IF we choose to consume a diet high in packaged and processed food.

We cannot complain about BEING highly stressed IF we choose not to find a way that helps manage the stress on a daily basis.

We cannot complain about being “unfit” IF we choose to not move our body in a way that feels good.

I think you get my drift.

The solution is fairly simple, but not easy when you are trying to do this in isolation UNLESS your desire and motivation levels are so high, it outweighs any negative self talk. Even then it will only take you so far, before you fall off the wagon again! Typically, support and accountability is needed in order to facilitate a long term lifestyle change.

I know this seems almost like a slap in the face, it was for me too. I had the story of “Oh, you don’t understand, it is different for me because of X, Y & Z”). There was almost a denial, but when I did surrender to it (OK, more like being dragged, kicking and screaming), it was so freeing, knowing that if there was something that was not to my taste, I had the ability to shift what was in my control which was only me.

 All of the sudden all the excuses fall by the wayside and you make room for creative solutions. This cannot be done, when you are still in victim or blame mode.

 “All blame is a waste of time. No matter how much fault you find with another, and regardless of how you blame him, it will not change you” – Wayne Dwyer

My question back to you - Given Ardell’s model of health, which area to you need to accept 100% self-responsibility. Let’s be clear, this is not the blame game either. It is about acknowledging and accepting our role in the current reality. If doing this work this by yourself, then do a self audit and ask:

• What behaviour needs to change in each area?

• How do I need to BE different in each area?

 If you have been unable to shift this by yourself and require some help, then reach out for a quick 20 min chat to see which one of my programs are a better fit for you.

Chantal is an Accredited and Certified Nutrition & Wellness Coach with a very special interest helping busy and overwhelmed mums transform the health of their family using gut healing nutrition and transformational mindset practices.

- Accredited Certificate of Nutrition & Super Nutrition, special focus on Childhood Nutrition - Cadence Health

- Certified Level 1 & 2 Wellness Coaching - Wellness Coaching Australia

- MINDD Forum Health Coach - Mindd Foundation

- Accredited Real Healthy Kids Facilitator having personally trained with Sally Gray ND

- Clinical Evidence Based EFT Practitioner - Evidence Based EFT

The essential way of "BEING" in order to transform you and your family's health and wellness

I’m going to get to the point, i.e. you need GRIT and COMMITMENT.

 Achieving extraordinary results in anything, let alone one’s health takes work, commitment and grit. These are attributes that requires cultivation.

 We live too much for ‘instant gratification’. I see this so often in nutrition & wellness coaching. Quite often I’m asked, “I’ve been gluten free for a week, why am I not healed?” Needless to say the looks of disappointment when it is revealed it requires much longer to get the true results you are after.

The truth be told, quite often you can get symptomatic relief quite quickly with nutritional adjustments, but to truly heal the root cause and rebuild the foundations, takes months which can easily be sped up with the right mindset.

credit: @nerdyrockson

 If I look at the evidence of my son, I got dramatic improvement in a matter of days which provided me the motivation to keep going, but it wasn’t until 18 months or so after the journey began that I took a sigh of relief.

There were so many bumps in the road, so many times I wanted to give up because it all felt “too hard”, but I was committed and had grit and therefore persevered and by damn, it paid off.  My mentality  and commitment to myself was, ‘ I will until”. That grit paid off big time, what seemed like a helpless case, became the essence of resilience and vitality.

 How to commit in 2 easy steps:

1. Become so clear what you want to achieve & more importantly WHY. The why is so important.

2. Find a way to stay accountable. Trying to do it solo, is like getting on the slow boat to china by foot! Surround yourself with a mentor or a community of like minded people and watch your results soar. I know this personally to be true on so many levels. Any awesome results I have achieved have been under the guidance of mentors and like minded communities.

If you are truly ready to commit, and have the grit, then I’d love for you too join me in the next round of my  group 6 week Total Health Transformation program or as my VIP for 12 weeks to get a very tailored approach.

Chantal is an Accredited and Certified Nutrition & Wellness Coach with a very special interest helping busy and overwhelmed mums transform the health of their family using gut healing nutrition and transformational mindset practices.

- Accredited Certificate of Nutrition & Super Nutrition, special focus on Childhood Nutrition - Cadence Health

- Certified Level 1 & 2 Wellness Coaching - Wellness Coaching Australia

- MINDD Forum Health Coach - Mindd Foundation

- Accredited Real Healthy Kids Facilitator having personally trained with Sally Gray ND

- Clinical Evidence Based EFT Practitioner - Evidence Based EFT